June 27

Last night we had our good friends over for dinner John, Leanna and Lily. I've known Leanna for years and she and I were roomates a few years back. It was fun living together because it was right around the same time that she met John and I met Andy, who knew just a few years later we'd all get married and be having dinner together, with the addition of sweet Lily!

Check out their blog...www.machadominute.blogspot.com/...you HAVE to watch the video of Lily laughing!!

On a side note, I'm reading The Shack, an amazing book! The main character looses a child to a brutal abduction and "The Great Sadness" has overcome his life and God invites him to this shack to simply love him and talk with him. It is a profound depiction of what our relationship is like with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit when we choose trust over control of our lives. I have to share this part of the book with you, at the time a few days ago, it brought tears to my eyes, he is in the shack with Papa (God) and they are talking about "The Great Sadness." I'll change the name from Mackenzie (the main character) to mine, "Meredith, I know that your heart is full of pain and anger and a lot of confusion. Together you and I, we'll get around to some of that while you're here. But I also want you to know that there is more going on than you could imagine or understand, even if I told you. As much as you are able, rest in what trust you have in me, no matter how small, okay?"-God

I wanna live my life in that sentence, I want all the pain of my family junk to be OK because of that sentence. I want to trust more and control less, I want freedom and silliness and playfulness, but I feel like I can live in fear, doubt, anger and clutching to anything that brings me quick satisfaction when I'm not trusting Him. God I want to trust you more.